nightmares don't end when we open our eyes, so said the narrator of Gossip Girl. These days it seems so true and real. I wished that i'll live on my own ass without any sort of intervention, like, let me paint my own picture. But life seems so lifeless, flavourless when it lacks the people faces on the collage.
So, I can never say that I'm gonna start afresh again. Clean slate. Because clean slate is for babies. Even phoenix which are reborn from the ashes are haunted by the guilty past, what more mortals. People are defined by the pasts, so we are. After all I cannot deny significant roles or my kins and friends and whoever informed of the blasphemous secrets. Kudos to you all, my life has been pink and peachy at some angle, and the other side is completely 180 degree difference.
Someone said, "to deny one's past is to deny one's self". so don't bother looking backwards and erase the tracks. They might be dirty and stained with splashes of sins, but it defines you. Deal with it. As I'm trying to. And it doesn't matter if you falls into slopes, and get dragged out of the rail, again, it is life experience.
Adults may hate me for saying this, but it's important to give us space for mistakes. It's in my education 115 hence my words are legal. Its factual.
And for some teenagers who think you are an adult, oh, how mature! Thank you so much for watching my back. And thank you for the judgment. What makes you a professional? Tell me. I have so much to tell you but I kept it to myself, because it might hurt. But you who deem yourself as a matured, randomly fired me with nasty judgment. How mature dear! Now I don't know your place; a 5th grader or a toddler.
But its ok! This 'immature' person doesn't mind eating his woes alone. Its all very fine. very normal. typical me right?!
wait, did I ever judge you??
